A Long Year

I started drowning last Friday.

Drowning in sad thoughts.

Thinking over this last year and all the difficult circumstances we have been thrown into like a raging sea.

I know I am not special in this. Many of you have lost so much and have experienced such sadness this year. I have ridden the waves of your burdens too, as only one can from a distance. It has been a tough year for many.

I feel tired and weak. It’s hard swimming against the tide. The under current threatens to pull you under and sweep you away.

That almost happened to me once when I was a child. If it weren’t for my strong Daddy’s arm I was holding on to with all of my might, I’m sure the current would have overtaken me.

Hmm… what a picture.

Maybe I am tired from holding on so tight. Grasping with all of my might to the truth of His words, His promises, trusting so hard when things just don’t make sense or go the way that seems right. When sin enters and destroys, when pain and meager efforts to control begin to overtake me.

Yes, I’m tired.

I have been tempted to get frustrated with Christmas coming so fast as it always does. With so much to do and no time or energy to do it. But that would truly be drowning. That would be loosing sight of the shore line.

It is for this reason we can celebrate. His coming.

If the toilets aren’t cleaned or the carpets go un-vacuumed, what does it matter?

He has come to give us rest, true rest in Him. He came to leave us with a Comforter for these times of deep sadness and trial. He came so that we wouldn’t have to drown in a sea of despair. He came to be our Rescuer. And He holds all things together even if it looks like everything is falling apart.

That is the life line I am tightly holding onto these days. My knuckles are white, my jaw a bit clenched, but I’m not going to let go. If I do, I’ll sink, I’m sure of it.

The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned…
For as in the day of Midian’s defeat, you have shattered the yoke that burdens them, the bar across their shoulders, the rod of their oppressor…
For unto us a child in born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace…
He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and familiar with suffering…
Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him and afflicted. but he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him and by his wounds we are healed. We all like sheep have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.
Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters…
(excerpts from Isaiah 9, 53, and 55)

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