Sometimes I get questions. But mostly I get stares. Sometimes I notice. But mostly I don’t.
It’s not something I think about anymore. That is unless I feel pain.
Lately I have been feeling a lot of pain. It makes me worry. I get frustrated. I want to be whole.
I want to be able to point to my scars and say, See I had the surgery! I’m better now. You can stop sending me pain. But the pain still remains.
Maybe it always will.
Instead of focusing on the pain, maybe I should focus more on the healing that has taken place.
I no longer have to wear double braces. I can sleep at night. I can sit with my back to a chair. I can drive. I can open a door. I can play the piano again. I can hold my babies without gritting teeth. I can cook and write and serve and throw a ball (well sort of) and brush my hair and put on make-up and clean up dishes and pick up toys and… wow
What kind of scars do you have? Can you see them or just feel them? How do they hurt you? Are you ashamed? Do people stare? Is there still feeling? Or maybe you have kept them so hidden they are just numb by now?
I think God sometimes uses the pain that’s left to remind us of how much He has already healed us. To remind of us of His power and grace in our lives. So that we can share our stories to encourage others. Sometimes there is still pain because there is still healing left to be done. Maybe you haven’t gone there yet. Maybe it hasn’t been the right time. And sometimes God has to open up the wound again so that true healing can take place. It healed up crooked or tangled and has to be reset. It’s all a painful process, but thankfully God is our Great Physician who is tender, careful, whom we can trust.